Hi.
I’m Kindra—alcoholic.
It’s been thirsty seconds since my last drink, and
thirty nine years since my last confession.
I turn forty in December.
I’ve kissed a few girls,
dropped acid
once,
finger fucked myself eleventy hundred times, and
committed adultery with an Englishman
who won’t leave me alone—
my pussy is lined with gold.
I smoke pot with my dad,
who abhors alcohol.
Hi.
I’m Kindra.
My mother was an alcoholic.
I don’t know how many times she’d
finger fucked herself, or how many joints
she’d smoked while riding shot-gun with my dad.
I don’t know if she’d ever dropped acid, or how many times
she might’ve wished she could confess to a god who’d
forsaken her.
All I know is that her life isn’t my problem—
I don’t have to make amends on her behalf.
My name is Kindra, and I battle against alcoholism.
I understand why I use, and I’m determined to
crush the crutches.
I’m determined to live for me.
© Kindra M. Austin
(image: The Piano Bar)
wow , i felt that
LikeLiked by 1 person
❤
LikeLike
Hope you get better
LikeLiked by 1 person
Interesting post as always
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much! ❤
LikeLike
My pleasure, Kindra. I’m a junkie.
LikeLiked by 1 person
If you ever want a meeting, I’m your girl. ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
I hadn’t commented, although I thought I must’ve. I am with you. I know you know.
LikeLiked by 1 person
❤ ❤ ❤ Today has been a great day, despite the evil sickness that Morgan visited upon this household. Jim and I are both sick. Who knew an innocent baby could make you feel like you've swallowed broken glass? My throat hurts. Ugh.
LikeLike
Haha…actually, I DID comment. I knew I probably did. My head is up my whizzway ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
whizzway. LOL ❤
LikeLike
A wonderful poem. This lady would be a Hemingway wish and a Poet’s muse. You made me smile today. I love your work.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow. This is one the best compliments EVER! Thank you, John ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
You are welcome Kindra. A amazing poem.
LikeLiked by 1 person
❤ 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Reblogged this on hands in the garden.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, my friend! ❤
LikeLike
This is absolutely everything. I’ve read it either times. You are a true writer in all the ways there can be
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow! Thank you so much. You’ve made my heart smile. ❤ It is everything to me to make connections with others. 🙂 Peace, Kindra
LikeLike
Reblogged this on cabbagesandkings524 and commented:
Kindra M. Austin – Confession and determination
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow! Thank you! ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Warrior inspiration in beautiful words of raw truth.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much. ❤ I appreciate your words. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Reblogged this on A Global Divergent Literary Collective and commented:
Kindra M. Austin/Poems & Paragraphs
LikeLiked by 1 person
Your a soldier of one in an army of the few
I hear your spirit and it sounds strong you write it out Kindra that’s what we do…over and over till there’s no more words in you ..you are the wick of the candle there always should be light
As Sheldon Yoursly
LikeLiked by 1 person
You always make my heart smile. Thank you, Sheldon ❤❤😊
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m gonna tell you something you always welcome your consistent and loyal fan of mine……and dam good fuvkin writer
Big Cyber Hugs with as love as you can possibly absorb through the screen
Aka The Professional Cannon
You’ll excuse me I haven’t use that in along
So make that the bow on this packagr
LikeLiked by 1 person
❤ ❤ ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh my god Kindra… I had no idea… you’re so brave to be fighting all of this and writing about it still! Much love and admiration.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you, Henna. You inspire me. ❤
LikeLike
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 A million comments or likes would never do these words justice. I am always stunned (even though I shouldn’t be) by the depths you’re willing to go in extracting beauty.
LikeLiked by 1 person
You are so kind, Devereaux. Much love to you. ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you Kindra ❤️ also, what qualifications are there for books to be published through Sudden Denouement?
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re most welcome, D. I’ll send you an email RE SD guidelines. ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Kindra. It’s crazy I’m just thinking about this but I was reading some other members and got curious…
LikeLiked by 1 person
I promise I’ll get to you soon. I’m working on updating the guidelines. ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
😁 no rush
LikeLiked by 1 person
Just wow.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you
LikeLiked by 1 person
Your talent for crafting visceral messages doesn’t diminish. Just keeps getting better and better. Whilst I cannot hope to fathom the deeper depths of your words, I hope you are well Kindra.
LikeLiked by 1 person
My Stellar Stuart! Thank you. How are you? I am doing well, despite what my poetry portrays. I’m sending you love and good vibes 🙂 ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Cheers Kindra. I’m not bad. Just need to keep finding the motivation to prioritise my writing lest my brain becomes a mush of gaming knowledge and football trivia.
Did you know my beloved Wolverhampton Wanderers haven’t won a top tier league title since the 1950s. Bugger! See what I mean?
LikeLiked by 1 person
That is a travesty! 🙂 ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Cheers Kindra. I’m not bad. Just need to keep finding the motivation to prioritise my writing lest my brain becomes a mush of gaming knowledge and football trivia.
Did you know that my beloved Wolverhampton Wanderers haven’t won a top tier league title since the 1950s. Bugger! See what I mean?
LikeLiked by 1 person
I think my reply may have ended up in your spam filter. Apologies.
LikeLiked by 1 person
It’s Spam’s fault. She can be a real bitch sometimes.
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is so hard hitting.., I loved the whole presentation of it as an introduction at AA meeting. Awesome
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you Megha. Thank you so much ❤
LikeLike
My pleasure Kindra.Your poems are treat for my soul.
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re melting heart. Xo
LikeLiked by 1 person
Omg this is your best post yet! (And that’s saying a lot, considering your talent) 🤗🤗😘. I’m sorry I’ve been away 😳 How’ve you been? ❣️❣️
LikeLiked by 2 people
Hello my friend! Thank you…<3
I'm doing well. I have lots of pots boiling at the moment, and I'm looking forward to a great deal. How are you, dear heart? ❤ 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m doing ok, sweet one 💓 School is kicking my arse and I’ve got my hands full with the kittens who are growing like weeds, and overall things are ok, I think 😉 Very happy for you that you’ve got stuff to look forward to! 🙌🏼💕
LikeLiked by 1 person
Kittens! Gaaah ❤ I wish I had a bunch of kittens. How much longer do you have at school?
LikeLike
This is crackling on the screen!
LikeLiked by 1 person
💛💛💛💛
LikeLike
I adore you and am inspired by you. Everything you are, everything you say…and write. And I love that you wrote this.
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re the best kind of friend. I love you endlessly. 💖💖💖
LikeLiked by 1 person
Oh crutches!! They are so damn easy but ever so hard to put away. Especially when we are running from ghosts! Love you lady, you got this! ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
I love you!!! Warrior Roar ❤❤❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yes! Love you ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
OMG. I read this and etarted to sob. And laugh. I am not an akcoholic but know ALL of those feelings. This poem is anazing. I can’t find the words to express what it fid to me. You are a very gifted poet
LikeLike
The Englishman won’t ‘leave you alone’ because he loved you like air. And still cares about you. But you’re words can be cruel, as well as finely profane.
LikeLike
So much love for you ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Back at you, my friend! 💖
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow. Clever, powerful, and funny in a sad but sentimental way. Loved it.
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m so glad! Thank you. Peace ❤
LikeLike
Reblogged this on Overflowing Ink and commented:
Brave and powerful!!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you SO much!!! ❤❤❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is THE best poem you have evert written. This is very brave, it gave me goosebumps!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow. Thank you 💖💖💖
LikeLiked by 1 person
It takes holy balls to admit that! I respect that
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is kind of brilliant 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you. I thought about what people go through at AA when I wrote this. Also, it’s about the absurdness of admitting things that don’t really matter.
Thank you for reading, and taking the time to leave your thoughts, 🙂
LikeLiked by 3 people
You’re already succeeding. I admire you, so brave. I’m sending you much love and good thoughts and hugs and stuff. [*+*]
LikeLiked by 1 person
Dang. Thank so so so much! ❤ Peace and good vibes! You've made my heart smile ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
You’re ever so welcome.
LikeLiked by 1 person
For real. Thank you. I can’t put into words how much your kindness means to me. ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person